Mental Health

Mental Health is surprisingly becoming more and more talked about, which is what needs to happen, unfortunately there are still a large amount of the population that don’t understand what is it like, what is is and how to react.

I’ve had a huge part of my life taken away from me due to mental health, lost jobs friends and so much more because of it, but why? why should people be made to feel even worse than they do just because someone else can’t be bothered to do their research and help someone feel welcome and supported in their darkness.

Now, i’ve been in ‘recovery’ for almost two years now and it has been a rollercoaster, as expected. Recovery isn’t plain sailing or straight forward, it is a lot of blips and falls and a hundred times over picking yourself back up- that’s the main part. Picking yourself back up again every time you fall, because if you don’t you won’t get better than you were, that’s what I personally need to remember right now... it may feel like it’s a never ending cycle but it is breakable with the right support and motivation. This will not last forever unless you let it. I was both lucky and unfortunate to have the chance to go to therapy, as much as talking about myself made me worse it also allowed me to get better and I don’t think the techniques are for everyone but it was nice to go to a place where I met so many amazing people to show me the way and support me during and after a breakdown. As many of my close friends and family would agree, they did let me down but they were also there way after to help me piece my life back together after. I will forever be grateful for the time, effort and support they took out every week to get me where I am today.

There are many diagnosis under Mental Health and not everyone has to be diagnosed to suffer, and to be honest it could be years of fighting and referrals to different professionals before you actually get where you need to be but if you persist you will get the correct help and  support you need to be able to over come the darkness inside.

What I find hardest about recovery is forgetting that you’re actually in it. Some of my behaviours and actions are due to my mental state, not all and i’m not using it as an excuse but my symptoms were all flashing red and I couldn’t figure out what was going on with myself before I read an article about mental health then it clicked... i’m going downhill. I personally feel the more you fall the harder it hits you, may not be the same for everyone but whenever it hits me it feels more intense and quicker than the last to get bad which is why it’s even more important to learn and recognise your signs and triggers to prevent it tumbling so fast that you’re already rock bottom before realising what is happening. When you have figured out your triggers (for example : change in routine, big events or being alone) it is time to start finding out ways to ease yourself through these times and distract yourself, that be reading a book, taking a spa break or listening to your favourite upbeat songs.. what ever makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside- do it!! Keep yourself busy in a positive and influential way and remember why you started turning your life around, it is hard but you will always  have atleast one person there to help you ever step of the way.

What it’s like (for me, not everyone) 

The only way I have ever been able to describe it is by having your worst  enemy trapped inside your brain. It’s like having someone else take over your head and control your thoughts, emotions, reactions, everything. I dont talk about it much to people because I don’t fully understand it, shocking I know but when it hits it’s like a non stop torment of negative and thoughts of self hate, self harm and it causes you to want to scream to make it all go away but it doesn’t. You need to force your actual brain back in gear, because I find the longer you dwell on the thoughts the more you’re feeding the fire and the bigger it gets and the more damage happens and the more the enemy takes over your whole life, changing who you are and creating it’s own little slave. ~ i’m not the best with wording any of this so pls don’t hate a girl for trying ~ 

Know someone suffering and don’t know what to do?

If it’s a daughter, brother, best friend or just someone you talk to online and you’re worried- do a bit of research. If you know they are suffering with mental health read a few articles or helps and tips there are millions available online that you can read through to understand more of what is happening. 

A main thing is to never take the blame or blame yourself. Your actions may cause slight hurt into the person but you are not the reason they are feeling like this. You never have and never will be. It is a chemical imbalance in the brain or tiny things that have happened over their lifetime that has build together to create who they are now. 

Listen- You may not have the words or understanding of what they are saying, but aslong as you are actively showing they mean something to you it will have a positive influence on them aswell as yourself. This counts with someone that’s not suffering too, ever had a conversation with someone and they’ve been so grateful for you listening to them? or even if someone had listened to you, how good have you felt and how good has it made you feel? be that person.

Don’t make them feel guilty. Mental health is not something that is chosen and it’s not something you wake up and have. Imagine if you fell ill and someone made you feel so incrediably guilty even though you literally have no choice, you can’t just say ‘go away’ or ‘ok that’s it ive had enough i’m turning my mental health off so I can be ok again’ it doesn’t turn off and on.

Reassurance- This is something that we need. Reassurance that you are there, not going, that you love them and the great things about them. 

Like I said in the above paragraph about what it’s like, it’s havin hate in your head constantly and by having people we care about encouraging us that our head is wrong and they think completely different can do a whole lot of good.

I am in no way shape or form a professional and what I have written is based on myself and my own thoughts, if you are suffering and feeling like you can’t cope then please please seek help, by a friend, family member, partner or professional.

Your GP would be most recommended but if you can wait long enough for an appointment then go to A&E or call 111 and ask for help/ advice. There are so many support systems out there so go and get yourself blossoming again.

Jacqueline x